Disclaimers:
This story is categorized as fan fiction. The characters of Xena,
Gabrielle, et al, which have appeared in the series Xena: Warrior
Princess, belong to the producers, writers and executives of
Renaissance Pictures and MCA/Universal Television. I claim only to have
borrowed them, without intent to profit or infringe these rights, for
the purpose of creating this story for enjoyment of the series' fans,
of which I count myself one of many.
Additionally, the story below contains references, explicit and
implied, of a sexual relationship between two consenting adults of the
same sex. If you are not of legal age to read this story, or such
material is illegal where you live, or you do not feel comfortable with
such content, please refrain from reading this story.
Timeline Notes: After "When We Dance, Who Leads?" and between episodes
"A Comedy of Eros" and "The Furies."
CHAPTER TWO
"Too what?" interjected the warrior having opened his eyes and
hearing himself being discussed.
"Well, I -- " Gabrielle came to an embarrassed halt.
"Just say it Gabrielle. I'm what?"
"Joxer, she didn't mean anything by it. We're just concerned."
"Concerned about me? What for? You think I'm a joke." He
struggled to sit up, and finally Xena reached over and helped him
up. His face just got darker. "Well, you know what, Xena? You're
right. I can't fight." He held himself stiffly, his face turning
red with the effort, but his voice had an uncommon venom. "I
can't defend myself, and I certainly am not getting any better at
staying out of trouble. What's this make? The fourth or fifth
time you've rescued me? What would have happened to me if you
hadn't come along? Well? Tell me that."
Xena and Gabrielle exchanged looks. Since Gabrielle had been the
one to stick her foot in it, Xena tried to answer. "You've told
us you came from a family of warlords, Joxer. We met Jett. You're
a better man than he is, but you're no fighter."
"Because no one has ever taught me," he replied. "Everything I've
learned I've taught myself."
Gabrielle looked from Joxer to Xena and took a nod from the
latter to say, "I think I'll go clean our dishes." She stood and
gathered the platters.
When Gabrielle was out of earshot, Xena shook her head and
responded under her breath, "Then that should be a clue, Joxer."
"You weren't perfect your entire life either, Xena. Somebody
taught you. Didn't they?"
"Yeah, and look what I did with that knowledge."
Joxer would not be swayed. "Xena, you've got to teach me how to
fight. Or at least defend myself."
Xena adamantly shook her head. "Not a chance, Joxer."
"Why not? You taught Gabrielle."
"She chooses to spar with me."
"So, spar with me. You have to, Xena. I'm tired of being the butt
of everyone's jokes."
"You're not the butt of any jokes, Joxer. Your heart is always in
the right place."
"Yeah? So help me put my sword in the right places too."
"Joxer, you don't know what you're asking."
The warrior grabbed the knife Gabrielle had used to debone the
fish. "Gabrielle is better than I am. Xena, don't you understand?
I can't live with that!" He threw the knife across the campsite.
The path of the flying knife narrowly missed Argo's hindquarters.
The mare skittered and neighed, turning her head to stare at the
two by the campfire. The knife imbedded itself in a tree.
"Joxer!" Xena grabbed for the warrior, valiantly restraining her
urge to hit him for endangering her horse.
He pulled free of Xena's grasp and grabbed another knife,
threatening her with it. She let go of him only because she was
startled. If the look in his eyes had been less dark, Xena might
have laughed at being held at knifepoint. Sweet, affable Joxer
had given way to a man Xena wasn't sure she knew. The Warrior
Princess knew then that Joxer was probably capable of harming
himself further before the night was over.
She grabbed his hand and pried the knife from his grip. "We'll
talk about this in the morning, when you're feeling more
yourself," she said between tightly clenched teeth. "Go to
sleep."
Joxer grimaced at the pain in his hand from her grip, but would
not back down. "This is not over, Xena. If you don't teach me,
I'll find someone who will."
"You'll get killed Joxer," she replied grimly.
"Better that than living like this. In front of her," he replied
lowering his voice and lying back as Gabrielle returned to the
campsite.
Xena shook her head and moved away. Gabrielle met her just
outside the firelight.
"Get a better sense of that uneasy feeling?" asked the bard.
Xena didn't want to worry Gabrielle with Joxer's shocking words,
so she said simply, "It'll look better to him in the morning. You
get some sleep." She kissed the bard's forehead and let her go to
her blanket.
Xena sat up by the fire, staring into the flames intently trying
to figure out what to do about Joxer. She couldn't teach him.
That would be to condone his continued pursuit of becoming a
warrior. She didn't want to do that.
But that look. Xena shivered, remembering that look. She'd never
seen Joxer that angry before. Something about that look spoke of
a dangerous promise to do himself harm. She couldn't allow that
either.
Something cracked a branch just outside the clearing. Xena jumped
up to see what it was, after noting that both Gabrielle and Joxer
slept soundly.
Xena released the rabbit from the branches in which it had caught
itself, and was watching it disappear when Gabrielle's scream
brought Xena racing back to the camp.
"What is it?" Xena found Gabrielle wrestling with Joxer.
"He was cutting at his bandages."
Xena pulled Gabrielle off Joxer and gently set the bard aside.
She grasped the warrior's shoulders and pinned him with her gaze.
He did not wither. "So what?" he snapped.
Gabrielle rubbed her shoulder where Joxer had struck her with his
fist. "I think I'll go out for a few minutes." For the second
time that evening, Gabrielle judiciously took herself away.
"You hit Gabrielle?!" Xena shook the man until his groan reminded
her he was injured. "Joxer! What in Hades' name has gotten into
you?"
"You don't care!"
"Joxer, I care enough not to strike you right now. A very close
thing, okay? I will... not permit you... to harm Gabrielle.
Ever." She took a deep breath. "Now. What were you doing with the
knife?"
"None of your business."
"Do you know what it would do to Gabrielle to find you dead in
the morning?"
"I wouldn't be stupid enough to let her find me."
"So you were trying to kill yourself?"
"I needed to get up and walk around for a while," he retorted,
not really answering her question.
"Joxer, your leg is broken. You weren't going to be able to go
anywhere very quickly."
"I wanted to get away from here."
"From her you mean?" Xena nodded when he looked up. "Yes, Joxer,
I know how you feel. It's not hard. I feel it myself. Whether or
not you're a good warrior is not important. You're a good man,
Joxer. That's what matters."
"But -- "
"Joxer listen to me. Gabrielle would never forgive you." She
braced herself. She'd have to argue with Gabrielle about what she
was about to say, so she wanted to make absolutely sure Joxer
understood. "I'll teach you enough to defend yourself. Nothing
more."
Gabrielle returned to find such a look of happiness on Joxer's
face before the warrior hugged Xena that she felt a moment of
uncertainty. "Feeling better, Joxer?"
"Um, yeah, sure." Joxer pulled away from Xena. "Thank you for
telling me I won't lose my leg, Xena."
"You'll be fine, Joxer. As long as you listen to me for the next
few days." Xena shot him a look that he correctly interpreted as
Don't say anything. I'll talk to Gabrielle myself.
"You got it, Xena."
Gabrielle went back to her blanket and settled again looking into
the fire. Xena walked out of the campsite. When they were alone,
Gabrielle asked Joxer, "Were you trying to leave before Xena gave
you a bill of good health?"
"No, I... I saw a panther out there and was going to stop him
before he came into the camp," replied Joxer with a fierce look.
Gabrielle nodded. "Good night, Joxer." The bard laid back on her
blanket and looked up at the stars briefly before closing her
eyes.
"Good night, Gabrielle."
Just outside the campsite, Xena leaned against a tree watching
Joxer and Gabrielle's exchange. Now I've done it, Xena thought.
She made a promise to herself to knock Joxer on his butt a few
times just because he continued in his false bravery. That'd be
his first lesson.
When both Gabrielle and Joxer were asleep, Xena returned to the
camp and rolled into her own blanket, wishing morning would never
come.
It did, of course. Xena was up before Gabrielle or Joxer moving
quickly through her morning workout. She returned to camp just as
Gabrielle was stirring.
"Morning, sleepyhead," Xena said warmly, leaning close. Gabrielle
was always so soft looking in the morning, it made Xena want to
repeatedly ravish the bard. Gabrielle walked with Xena down to
the spring. Both women stripped and slid into the water.
Gabrielle moved behind Xena with the soap.
Gabrielle looked up and smiled at the look of lust on Xena's
face, then she noticed the thin sheen of perspiration she was
washing off. "Good workout this morning?"
"Couldn't do any other workout," replied Xena with a lustful
smile.
"What did you promise Joxer last night, Xena?"
Xena pulled back and answered honestly, watching Gabrielle's face
carefully. "I promised I'd teach him." She held up a hand. "To
defend himself."
"He wants more."
"I know."
"Can you do this?"
"What other choice do I have? I won't be responsible for his
death."
"I'll talk him into going back to Meg."
"He won't do that. Something in his face, Gabrielle. I saw... I
don't know. I saw Jett there for a moment."
Gabrielle shivered. "Joxer could never do anything like that."
"I'm not so sure, Gabrielle." Xena shook her head. "If I don't
teach him he will get himself killed. I'm certain of it now."
Gabrielle sighed. "Along with some fighting skill, do you think
you can explain to him when he should run?"
Xena laughed. "I'll certainly try. We'd better get back to camp."
When the two women returned to camp, they found Joxer sitting up
stiffly trying to pull his own pack toward him. Exchanging a look
with Gabrielle, Xena picked up the pack and dropped it next to
Joxer. "First thing, Joxer. Speak up when you need something. I
won't train you if you don't get your full strength back. And you
can't do that until you mend."
Gabrielle watched Joxer's back stiffen but then he caught a look
from Xena and the bravado fell aside. This might work after all.
Chapter 3